My Darling, Fall,

Some love last, some love fades, and some might even say that love travels in seasons.

For myself, I tend to love things that are too good to be true. I love the house that I simply can not buy, the town that is halfway across the world from my family, the dress that doesn’t fit right, and the guy who is wonderful on paper and yet does not exist in my three-dimensional world.

For myself, there is one love that burns a hole in my heart, year in and year out. It’s the kind of love that makes me weak in my knees when I meet it first thing in the morning. The kind of love that brings out the best feelings of nostalgia, happiness, and the pursuit of new memories. This incredibly special kind of love goes by the name of Fall.

Try and imagine the type of person who does everything they can to build you up, to support every decision you make, to be there for you through your happiest times, and will wrap you in it’s arms when the days get long, cold, and difficult. That is my love, Fall.

Some of the very best days of my life have happened during the fall seasons. Not to ignore that some of the worst have darkened those chilly, picturesque moments, as well.

Fall is my dream coming true. Fall is on my mind year-round. I don’t anticipate the warm spring mornings, the sunny beach days, the boat rides, and cookouts. My mind is constantly swirling around the idea of getting to wear my favorite coat, the one with a corduroy collar, and the apple picking that I want to take my dog to. The cool nights, sitting on the bleachers, cheering on my nephew’s football team, the shared cider under the warmth of a cozy brown blanket. Some of the best moments are the ones that we get to spend with family.

There is an unspoken rule that during fall you must try and cram in as many pumpkin patches, movie nights, and batches of deliciously hot soup as possible. The nights might become dark and cold, but this is where the magic enters the chat.

As if fall couldn’t provide for me enough, I am also gifted the anticipation of the holidays that have yet to come. Everywhere the air starts to fill up with cheer, laughter, and a strong sense of community. If there was ever a moment in life to feel like you are wearing permanent rose-colored glasses, this would be it. I swear that during the “ber” months, everything sparkles like the most beautiful treasure you’ve ever encountered.

Fall takes care of me. Fall takes care of my family. The best moments in my life have happened during these beautiful, red and orange tree-filled, months and it leaves me feeling eternally grateful. This relationship is exactly like the ones you see in the movies.

During these few, yet perfect months, it is almost as if Nancy Meyers steps in and waves her magical, directorial wand around and makes everything in my life into a movie. You might say I am the luckiest gal in the world, yet I have a feeling that you too have a Fall in your life… put on a cozy sweater, fill up your coffee mug, and start to pay attention to the feelings that arise inside of you. That’s Fall, doing what it does best!

As of today, I am days away from October, anxiously anticipating the first sweater-wearing days, the kind that forces you to buy five hot, hot coffees, all in a day’s time.

Please don’t get me wrong, Fall and I most definitely experience our highs and lows, but ultimately I know that Fall will be by my side no matter what. There is always an apple-scented candle to light, a warm blanket to crawl under, and most importantly a nostalgic movie to throw on, at any given moment.

I feel incredibly lucky to get to call Fall the love of my life; besides my girl Gigi and baby Bookie… of course.

Fall, I love you! Thank you for always being by my side! I look forward to the many, many, years that we have had and are going to have together.

xxx

Your favorite lover, Ashtyn.

Dear Summertime,

My dearest Summertime, it’s me, Ash.

The time has come for me to break some news to you…

You know how in my favorite romcoms the dick of a guy always breaks up with the girl and states “it’s not you, darling. It’s me… I just need some time to work on myself.” Well, for the first time ever, I get to be the bad guy and say “Summer, it’s 100% YOU and not me. Please go fuck yourself and take your 100+ degrees with you”.

You are everything I hate about this lifetime. The agony I feel when I wake up and my windows are sweaty from the humidity outside, the suffocating feeling of walking my dog outside at 6am, simply because the ground will be too hot fifteen minuets from now, and really just all of the shit you pull… I am too tired for this and am finally standing up to you and saying “See ya never”!!!

Your attitude this summer has been so pitiful that even the most extreme conservatives are tuning into CNN for climate crisis updates. Way to unite the world I guess.

Sure we have had some good times together. There have been many beautiful moments with family and friends, time at the lake, cookouts, alfresco dining… the works. But that is simply not enough for me. I need more to fulfill me. I want someone who will cloak me in a warm blanket, when the chilly winds brushes my cheeks. I need Saturday football games, bonfires and smores, witches and candy corn, doggy sweaters and pictures that are more brown and moody than that sun-bleached, squinty eyed bs that you try so hard to make cute.

The hardest part of saying goodbye to you is parting with my white jeans and straw hats. I will miss those things dearly.

For now, I feel that it’s best for us to part. I would really love it if you could get as far away from me as possible, as I need lots of time to heal. Maybe someday, or like eight months from now, I will be ready to talk once again… only time will tell.

Goodbye Summertime. You really made your mark and will not be missed.

xxx

your least favorite lover, Ashtyn

Good Morning World,

You know how, in every romantic movie to ever exist, there’s always that one scene that takes place at the break of dawn? There air is cool, a fog is settled into the countryside, and the promise of daylight is on the horizon. All is right in the world. There is peace in the quiet and ease at the start of the day… This is where I linger. I question the sanity of the storyteller. Have you ever experienced a truly quiet morning? Like not one single peep from anywhere? Yeah, me either.

As I sit here this morning, typing out my woes, I am mesmerized by the audience that surrounds me. Imagine, just for this moment, that we are in a romantic movie. Allow me to welcome you into the scene:

The golden flecks of the morning sun paint the worn streets with a glimmer of hope, the spring grass turned to gold, shadows playing their daily games. The air feels cold, although I’ve not yet made it outside. One can always tell when there’s a chill in the air. It’s a good chill though, the kind that holds the promise of spring returning once again. I glance at my clock, knowing that I am alone in my house, the rest having already journeyed into their day. Yet, I am not alone. Oh no, quite the contrary. I have awoken like a queen, being serenaded by a choir of chirping angels. A melody of bird conversations plays just out my window, so much to say after a restful slumber. Who told these sweet birds to sleep? That a peep could not be heard until morning light? I am reminded of the conversations I have with those that I love the most, upon seeing them for the first time in a day. So much to say, no limit to what could be said, yet, I was just alone and asleep. When would I have come up with so many thoughts? Why is now the best moment to get this out? Am I a bird? Are the birds like me? I sit alone, yet not alone, taking in the glorious sounds of morning. No quiet moments to be found, yet I haven’t said one single word. The day has arrived, beautiful and full of choices. She’s singing out with love, and compassion, letting the world know that anything is possible.

That’s an honest morning for you. No flashy moments, nothing crazy to be found, yet not so quiet either. I wonder why the sound of silence is so often glorified? We are often taught that the best thing we can be is silent. In school, the first thing we learn is to quiet up, when we have big life-altering decisions to make, we retreat to a quiet place to think, silence appears everywhere in our day to day. But what do we gain from silence? More importantly, what do we lose from silence? I ask myself this today, with the intent to reflect further. Might you join me in this?

Wednesday, here you are. Beautiful, dreamlike, and full of promise. Thank you for visiting me this week.

All my love to you all,

Ash

Hi there,

If you’re currently reading this then I am certain of one of three things… you are either a stellar friend, or you blindly clicked the link, which if this is true… thank you for your support… or perhaps, just maybe, you are interested in literature and are wildly fascinated by the world of producing for the screen. ( I fall into the last category myself!)

No matter how you got here, I am happy to meet you, to learn from you, and to share a safe and creative space with you and that wildly beautiful mind of yours.

I intend to create a community that’s routed in acceptance, curiosity, bravery, and kindness. Pretty cool, huh?

Anywho, you’ve officially found yourself as a new member of my unofficial book club. I read tons of books, many of which are recommended to me via social media, other book clubs, etc… I am always, always, reading and want to share reviews of the stories that I’ve encountered. This space is also open for your input, book recs, and any other thoughts brewing in your mind.

I feel obliged to discuss my dreams and aspirations… deep right? I am a lover of film and television, I go through life in a constant state of story development/living inside my imaginary world, and time and time again, I find myself finishing a book, turning on my tv, and searching for its on-screen counterpart. Much of the time, these stories aren’t available. And I understand that some books, or many… depending on the reader… aren’t meant to live beyond the pages, but for someone like myself, I’d give anything to see my favorite book characters living and breathing on the screen.

So, here I am, setting out to make this happen. I am nowhere near a professional, nor do I have much knowledge on how my input can make the slightest difference, but it’s worth my time and the shot in the dark. I have a passion that burns in my stomach and an ache in my heart, every time a book gets developed and I am not involved.

My game plan is this:

I intend to use this page to share what I’ve read, my thoughts and feelings, highs and lows… you know the drill.

I will then rate the book on a meter of 1-5 (1 being read it but not spark- 5 being this book must be a movie and I will be creative producing it asap.)

From there, I’d love to create a safe space for my development, pitch decks, production bibles, etc. to show you how I see the show in my mind. The intent is to create an outlet for myself to grow and learn in; while also providing you with some fun reading.

So, what do you think? Sound fun? Want to drink the punch with me? Get ready for all things books, literature, film and tv, and anything else that finds its way in.

If you’re ready to be the ultimate reader, welcome to my family!

See you soon for my first book review, I have plenty of archived books to get out of the way, and will be adding to my current reads as well.

Until next time, book lover!

xxx Ashtyn